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Wizards at Sixers Pregame: Shirley Temples, Hot Dogs, And Jorts!


Preseason Game 4

Washington (2-1) at Philadelphia (2-2)

October 16, 2015 at 7:00 PM
Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, PA
TV: CSN Washington
Radio: 99.1FM

Last time they met was..

October 6, 2015 – Verizon Center, Washington, DC – Wizards 129, Sixers 95
Preseason Game Notebook 1

What to Watch:

A rain of fire.

Bro. I don’t even play World of Warcraft. But when I thought of how many 3’s the Wizards may knock down tonight, the term a “rain of fire” came about my creative mind, and this was the Google image result.


An appropriate Google image result. And that guy kind of looks like wizard, too.

Earlier this summer, Randy Wittman renewed his coaching vows, promising to get his team to shoot more 3’s. Last season, the Wizards shot an average of just 17 three-pointers per game, a dismal rate considering the number of able shooters on the roster.

Through three preseason games, the Wizards are seemingly living up their new style of play, having attempted a total of 79 three’s through three games, an average of 26 per game, which is a whopping 10 more attempts per game than last season. If not for the atrocious shooting night versus the Knicks in their second preseason game (4-for-23), the Wizards would have been shooting close to 50% from downtown. Even then, they’ve made 41% of their 3’s and that’s fair. The Wizards had eight different players make a 3 against Philly in their presesaon opener. EIGHT. That’s a shit ton of alphanumeric last names (and a middle name) for #WizardsTwitter:


According to a World of Warcraft wiki page, the ‘rain of fire’ spell “burns enemies in the area of effect for x Fire damage over 6 sec, dealing 50% increased damage to targets affected by Immolate.” I’m pretty sure when you translate that into basketball analytics, it affirms the Wizards’ recent stride from long range.

Key matchup:

Gortat vs. Okafor


(Alex Brandon/Associated Press)

A rattled Marcin Gortat can cause a scary Marcin Gortat. Not sure how much so in a meaningless preseason game but after Jahil Okafor fearlessly stepped up to his first NBA challenge in the preseason opener – and succeeded in the first five minutes – Gortat was a playfully incensed.

One thing is sure: He’s on my list right now. The next four games, I’m coming, I’m coming. I hope he’s going to read that. I’m coming. I’m coming for him.”

I see a smaller version of [Charlotte Hornets center] Al Jefferson. I see a little version of Al Jefferson. Slow but strong, methodical big man with a ready, pretty nice game in the post. He hit a couple of tough shots.”

Gortat comparing Okafor to Al Jefferson is no real surprise if you are familiar with that matchup. Jefferson has been prone to giving Gortat the business over the past two seasons since Gortat has been a Wizard.

With Wittman experiment with lineups in the presesaon, particularly the front court, it’s no certainty whether Gortat will start or if he will get a lot of matchups against Okafor as much as he did in the first game. My guess, though, is that he will.



Josh Harrellson – shameless donner of jorts and pursuer of a professional basketball career – is in his latest stint with an NBA team after spending a year in China. As part of the offensive revolution in DC, Jorts was brought into to utilize his skills as a deep-range shooting big man and against Brazil, he finally broke out, knocking down three of four 3-point shots.

Jorts may not only be an X-factor in this game coming off the deep end of the bench and knocking down shots, but he’s an X-factor for his own future. The Wizards could become more inclined to sign Harrellson for the season if he continues to give them reasons to. Tonight will be the next step in figuring that out.

Fun factor:

A round of Shirley Temples on Joel Embiid!

The news coming out of Philly regarding Joel Embiid and his dietary habits isn’t exactly favorable. In fact, it’s very Kwame-like. From Uproxx:

“This type of disregard for instruction also extends to Embiid’s dietary habits. Per a source, the Sixers’ training staff was so concerned about what he was eating, they stocked the refrigerator in his downtown hotel residence each week with healthy food. When a staffer went to restock the fridge each week, most everything was uneaten and unopened, and they were throwing out the fruits and vegetables every week. When the team subsequently asked to see Embiid’s room service bill, they found that most days he was ordering junk food along with his signature beverage, a pitcher of Shirley Temples. Embiid also was frequently seen feasting on chicken fingers and hot dogs at and after games.”

This excerpt explains the look on Embiid’s face in the photo below. That somber look of regret after you’ve downed more hot dogs than you should have. I have had this look on my face before.



The Wizards continue their foray of 3-point shots. Marcin Gortat spanks Jahil Okafor for being disrespectful. Josh Harrellson does not wear jorts. And Joel Embiid will eat a hot dog at halftime.

Oh and the Wizards will win.

we are Hoop District

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